Redeeming Controversial Material

I have recently come across several situations where I use controversial material to help shepherd the flock. Can you please give us your wisdom on the subject of "How can we redeem controversial material."

I have three examples of material that I use on a regular basis:

1. Baby Wise 
   Many people in our fellowship group have expressed frustration in helping their babies sleep through the night. Many of them struggling for 12-18 months. In one particular case I asked the father if he had read Baby Wise,  he said, "No I heard that book was controversial." (So how do I redeem this material to help this tired family?)  I explained that there are some goofy concepts in the latter part of the book, but the first couple chapters do a good job defining philosophies such as, "Who knows what's best for the baby: the baby or the parent?" There is also practical wisdom on how to get your baby on a schedule and help them fall asleep without the need of any sleeping aids. I told him it really just comes down to doing some math about how long your baby has slept and ate, and where they are in the day. The father being a computer programer said, "You can't argue with math." Haha, well said.


2. The 5 Love Languages
   I recently gave out a sheet with these 5 descriptions from Chapman on how to express love to your spouse. A very godly and discerning husband later gave me the link to an article from the Journal of Biblical Counseling dealing with the biblical problems with this book. It seems as though Powlison, the author of the article, does not see much redeeming value in these 5 descriptions of love. I am thankful for what this article brought to my attention, I'm not borrowing the 5LL from Chapman, I stole them and reconfigured them biblically. Is this a good approach? Can we redeem these 5LL without confusing people or having them think we are taking them down the enlightened road of psychology?


3. Way of the Master
   Jessie Johnson has already opened this can of worms and John MacArthur closed it. But it is another good example about how to make sure that we are redeeming good concepts and not burning them down just because they become controversial. You don't have to destroy something to help people's decrement. Sometimes I feel like people are yelling at me, GET RID OF THE OVEN IN YOUR HOUSE OTHERWISE YOUR KIDS MAY GET BURNED!! Ok, but how am I going to cook my food? I DON'T KNOW, BUT DON'T USE AN OVEN - FOR YOUR KIDS SAKES! Why can't I just train my children to not touch the oven?

For those who wish to stay on the log.

Wedding Bells

I may have the opportunity to officiate my first wedding ceremony. This is a scary thing for me.

Some of you have already done a wedding or two. What have you men learned from your experience? What counsel do you all have for doing weddings? Should I do pre-marital? How long? What resources are good?

Also, what principles should direct us if we are marrying a non-Christian couple? What standards do we hold them to?